The best and worst in holiday music

A week later, and I still have Christmas music on my mind.

It's hard to get away from it this time of year.

Having talked about different kinds of holiday classics last week, I thought I'd devote this column to the best and worst of the Yuletide music scene. Here's my picks:

— Best Christmas song (secular): "Sleigh Ride." A great upbeat tune, that's best performed as an instrumental, preferably with some kind of brass band. When sung, it has one of the best lines in any Christmas song: "These wonderful things are the things we'll remember all through our lives!"

— Best Christmas song (religious): "O Holy Night." When done right, it'll give you chills.

— Most overrated: "Silent Night." If done well, it's not bad. The problem is, it's rarely done well. Most often, it just drones on and on, especially when performed by marginal school choirs and community civic clubs. And everyone reveres it as something hallowed, that simply must be sung. It turns my stomach sometimes.

— Most underrated: "Still, Still, Still." Perhaps the most angelic tune of the season.

— Easiest to Sing Along To: "Jingle Bells." It doesn't matter if you're 5 or 95, you can sing this one well. (Civic clubs ought to stick to this fare.)

— Most Overplayed by Memphis Radio Stations: "Christmas in the Trailer Park." It's the modern-day equivalent to "Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer." Seriously, you write a song that mentions NASCAR or Hooters, and you can pretty much guarantee unlimited air time in Memphis. Sorry guys ... the song just isn't that funny.

— Most Overplayed by Local Radio Stations: "Donde Esta Santa Claus." Granted, playing this recording even once constitutes "overplayed" in my book. I mean, if you're going to play a cheesy stereotypical Hispanic holiday song, at least play "The Hat I Got for Christmas is Too Big." Any song that contains the word "mamacita" should be avoided.

— Most Likely to Make Me Get Up and Dance: "Linus and Lucy," from the "Charlie Brown Christmas" TV special. It's just piano and a little bit of percussion, but it still rocks. My 5-year-old son, Drew, and I love to shake our booties when we hear this one.

— Best New Version of a Christmas Classic: "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen/We Three Kings," by the Barenaked Ladies with Sarah McLaughlin. I see this recording becoming the new standard for those traditional songs.

— Most Likely to be Parodied: "The 12 Days of Christmas." There's about a million versions of this song, and almost all are great. There's the McKenzie Brothers version, the Muppets version, the "12 Pains of Christmas version" and even a redneck version (which they no doubt love on Memphis radio). Someone ought to release an album consisting entirely of "12 Days of Christmas" versions.

— Most Likely to be Parodied by My Kids: "Joy to the World." The following are actual lyrics that emanated from the backseat of my car: "Joy to the world; my fish is dead; I flushed him down the toilet! Because he really stinked; because he really stinked; he really stunk so bad; he really stunk so bad; so I flushed him down the toilet."

— Most Likely to Get Stuck in My Head for Days: "Where are you Christmas" by Faith Hill. Don't get me wrong; I like the song. It's one of the best new holiday songs in recent memory. But once lodged in my cranium, it stays there forever, and that gets tiring. (Honorable mention: "Donde Esta Santa Claus." Thank you, KQDD.)

— Best Christmas song (overall): "The Christmas Song," also known as "Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire." No song better captures the warm and fuzzy feeling of the holiday season. It's been my favorite for years, and it still is.